What are we doing when we meet someone for the first time? We’re sizing them up, noticing similarities and assessing differences. We’re looking for things we can relate to. Yes, we’re judging people on the way they look.

Why do we do this?

It goes back to our basic instinct for survival. Is this person a “friend or foe”? Before societies and laws were developed, the world was a very dangerous place. We, as a species, don’t run very fast, relative to predators and spears and bullets, so to enhance our chances of survival, we evolved really good vision. We needed to know immediately, and at a distance, “Is this person a member of my clan and someone I can align with, or is this person going to harm me?”

Fast forward to today.

This means is that people are checking you out all the time, and making judgments based on the image you present to the world, to see if you fit into their clan (organization, culture, company, etc.). I say that this is a good thing! This is your opportunity to control how people judge you, before they know you. Take the time to adjust your image to meet the circumstances. Work it to your advantage.

Let me say that again: You are in control.

When you walk into a new situation, know that you are putting your best self forward by planning and preparing how you look. “People are looking at me and judging me.” Guess what, they are. And guess what else, it’s perfectly alright. Now you know they are assessing you to see if you fit into their clan, and you’ve maximized your chances of success.

Excerpted from “Wonder Women” presented at Harvard Business School